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If I look back, I am lost.

"If I look back, I am lost" ~Daenerys Targaryen, A Song of Fire and Ice.

Really, it absolutely tells my state of being right now.

Looking back, I remembered how well he made me feel being loved. We were so cool. Love's been undemanding. We were so supportive of each other. We were happy. I was the greatest match ever for him.

And then something suddenly happened. He said he would try to prove he can live without me. Of course, he can! But what's a relationship for if you'd have a mindset like that. I can live without him too, but why would I. I chose to be with him.

But for him, he CHOSE to go on without me. He did not stick through the end. He... :(

Love has been lost. Love faded and died. He fell out of it.

It is said that, "Love does not die easily. It is a living thing. It thrives in the face of all life's hazards, save one: neglect".

Have I been neglected? Or have I neglected him?  Have I neglected US?  If I look back, I am lost.

So starting today, I will not look back. I will move on, go forward, and put this in my mind... "When people walk out of your life, let them. You might miss them, but remember that you're not the one who gave up".

Because I have not given up. My reason for breaking up with him was just to give him space and time to realize my worth. He can't miss me and want me back if I'm still his.

But then again, some things just never go our way. Some things are not meant to be. It's over. He's gone.

If I look back, I am lost.

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